


Let me in, please?

by Anonymous



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Character Death, Hurt/Comfort, Illnesses, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-20
Updated: 2019-08-20
Packaged: 2020-09-19 10:25:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20329603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Javier scanned the aisles, trying to find the cat food section for his beloved, grumpy princess at home, when he, in his exhausted and delirious state, inevitably crashed into someone else. He apologised in Spanish before he remembered he was in Canada and not Spain.(Please check the tags. Illness warning)





	Let me in, please?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [K1mHeechu1](https://archiveofourown.org/users/K1mHeechu1/gifts).

Javier scanned the aisles, trying to find the cat food section for his beloved, grumpy princess at home, when he, in his exhausted and delirious state, inevitably crashed into someone else. He apologised in Spanish before he remembered he was in Canada and not Spain.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to crash into you," Javier mumbled, raising his eyes from his feet and up to meet the stranger's eyes. His heart skipped a beat for a moment and his breath caught in his throat. He swallowed, trying to calm himself down as he met a pair of beautiful, near black eyes full of painful tears and well guarded emotions concealed behind a curtain of black fringe. Javier let out a soft gasp as the stranger lowered his eyes and shook his head.

"Sorry. Wasn't paying attention."

The stranger was beautiful, from his eyes that had immediately caught Javier's attention to his perfectly proportioned body. His waist was so slim, leading to the most beautiful curves Javier almost wanted to reach out and touch, and, although he wasn't bulky, Javier was convinced he would feel hard, lean muscle if he reached out and touched the stranger.

"Dad?"

Javier and the stranger both looked to the third person. Clinging tightly to the stranger's hand was a child, no older than seven and slim with a similar build. His face was rounder and he had the softest looking cheeks Javier had ever seen, with similar dark eyes to his father's and floppy black hair that also fell into his eyes. He had the cutest button nose Javier had ever seen, and he had on a black mask with a cute animal mouth on it. It had slipped down, exposing his nose but covering his mouth. Javier had no doubt that he would have been an ideal model for the future.

The stranger squeezed his son's hand and half smiled at Javier before he turned back to the child. "We'll be going home soon, I promise. Does it hurt?"

The child shook his head and hid his face from Javier's view shyly. Javier cleared his throat and crouched down to smile at the child.

"Hi there little man. I'm Javier. Nice to meet you. What's your name?"

The child looked him up and down with wide eyes and, when he opened his mouth slightly, Javier's heart lurched at the sight of dark red on his lower lip and teeth. The mask had slipped down and exposed it. The child looked up at his father before he looked back at Javier with a little frown.

"J-Jun...."

"Hi there Jun," Javier said with a little grin. "L-listen, I'm sorry for crashing into you and your dad. Can I make it up to the pair of you?"

To his shock and minor horror, the child shoved his shoulders and pushed him away. With tears in his deep brown eyes, he shook his head and hid his face in his father's leg.

"Go away!"

"Sorry," his father finally spoke up, "he doesn't like people getting close to us anymore."

"At least let me apologise for crashing into the pair of you? Please? Let me take you out to coffee sometime?"

"You don't even know my name."

Javier sighed and brushed his eyes out of his face. "Please? I'll walk you both home then because I'm worried about you two being hurt or something."

"If I didn't know better, Javier-san, I'd think you were babying us."

"San?" Javier's face broke out into a smile. "You're Japanese!"

The other nodded and bowed his head lightly. "I'm Hanyu Yuzuru. Yuzuru is my first name."

"Nice to meet you Yuzuru. Your son is so cute by the way."

Yuzuru went pale and scooped the child up, resting him on his hip as he

swallowed down the lump in his throat. "T-thank you..."

He was cut off by an alarm on his phone going off. The child groaned and buried his face in Yuzuru's shoulder as the other sighed and opened up his backpack. He unscrewed the bottle of water one handed and gave the child a tablet to swallow as well as the water.

"I know, Jun, I know. Just... please? For me?"

Javier felt almost like he was watching something too intimate for him to watch, and he turned away to give the pair a little privacy. Yuzuru stroked his son's hair as the child swallowed the pill obediently and then cuddled up to him again. Yuzuru then shifted their basket in his arms and groaned.

"Sorry Junnie. Can we live without the maple leaf cookies?"

"Here," Javier took the basket out of Yuzuru's hands and added his own things to it, keeping a tight hold of it. He found the cat food for his nearly forgotten, beloved princess and the trio headed to the checkout together. Before Yuzuru could protest properly, Javier paid for all their shopping for them.

"W-why?" Yuzuru asked softly, shifting the bag and Jun in his arms. "You barely know me."

"Because I want to help you." Javier confessed as they stood together outside the supermarket, waiting for the rain to calm down.

"What do you want in return?"

"I don't need anything in return. I did it because I wanted to help you."

Yuzuru gave him a level look, and Javier sighed.

"Come with me to get coffee one day, or to meet my cat, or something. Please. I want to be your friend."

Something almost unreadable flashed in Yuzuru's eyes and he swallowed. Jun cuddled him tighter, but Yuzuru nodded.

"Alright. But I should warn you, Javier, that we... You don't want to get close to someone like me?"

"What is someone like you like?" Javier asked quietly. Yuzuru swallowed, Adam's apple bobbing lightly as emotion flooded his eyes and then vanished again before Javier really had time to register it. Luckily for Yuzuru and Jun, their bus arrived. Yuzuru scribbled his number down on a slip of paper quickly and handed it to Javier before he and his now asleep child climbed onto the bus and sped away from Javier.

* * *

"Can't believe you dragged me out to a coffee shop," Yuzuru mumbled over the top of his soy matcha latte. Javier smiled across the table at him and sipped at his own black americano. "I never go out anymore."

"I'm glad I could get you out of the house then," he smiled. "Yuzuru, what do you do?"

"Take each day as it comes I guess."

"No, I mean, what do you do as a job?"

Yuzuru went quiet and looked over at the soft play area. Jun, being the very shy child he was, was hiding away from most of the other children in the soft play area, too quiet to introduce himself to the others. Yuzuru's heart ached slightly as he watched the youngster try to avoid the others, cheeks burning almost in embarrassment from his shyness. His black mask covered up his nose and mouth.

"Whatever he needs me to do," Yuzuru said finally.

Javier raised an eyebrow at him. "He's your son then?"

Yuzuru nodded, eyes clouding, and Javier studied his profile. "I'd give him the world if I could. Sadly I-I... I can't."

"His mother--"

"He doesn't have one." Yuzuru's voice turned cold. "She walked out of our life and we never want her back. She left him. She left us. She doesn't get to see him again because she abandoned him when he needed her the most."

Javier nodded, turning his eyes back to Jun in the play area. "What were your dreams? When you were younger, what was your dream career?"

Yuzuru half snorted. "I wanted to be a figure skater. Was pretty good at it too. But then she got pregnant with Jun, and I retired for her, only for her to leave me. To leave us. I picked up a choreography job where I could to support both of us but, then-- e-everything... He... It's complicated and I shouldn't be telling you this."

Javier reached across the table and placed a gentle hand on Yuzuru's. "It's alright. You don't have to tell me anything else. I appreciate you feeling you can open up this much and tell me all of this."

"You're one of my first real friends here in Canada." Yuzuru confessed.

"Why did you move to Canada?" Javier asked quietly, hoping he didn't poke at another raw wound. Yuzuru grimaced slightly.

"M-medical reasons..."

"You and Jun are Japanese citizens, right?"

"No, I am. Jun is a South Korean citizen because of his mother. She wanted him to be born there, and dual nationality is really complicated, especially for those two countries." Yuzuru groaned, rubbing at his forehead. "I love Jun with all my heart, but his mother was a nightmare. I should have seen it earlier."

Javier squeezed his hand lightly. "Well, for what it's worth, I'm here for the pair of you if you need me. I'll be his other dad if he needs."

Yuzuru looked up at him with wide eyes. "I-I... J-Javier I.... I-I can't accept that."

"Just because you've been hurt before doesn't mean you don't get the chance to be close to someone again."

"I just don't want him to get hurt again." Yuzuru mumbled, looking at his son again. The shy child had been approached by some children, and they included him in their little adventure game. Yuzuru swallowed as he watched him, sighing.

"I wish he could be a normal kid."

* * *

"So, you still didn't tell me what you do as a job?" Javier asked again. This time they were at Javier's home, with Yuzuru and Javier sitting together on one sofa and Jun was curled up on an armchair with Effie, the calico cat, settled on his lap happily. The child stroked her ears gently and she purred, nuzzling up against his hand with soft purrs and little licks to his palm, earning little giggles from him.

"I-I... Well... I still do a little choreography. Luckily it's flexible enough that I can run when I need to take care of him. To cover all the bills I-I... I do what I can. But it's hard to maintain a real, stable job when you need to be able to drop everything at a moment's notice. I do whatever I can to make sure we have enough money to cover... Everything."

"If you need-"

"I can't ask that from you." Yuzuru said quietly. Javier patted his shoulder.

"You're not asking. I'm offering Yuzuru."

"Why?" Yuzuru asked, looking up at him with big, wide eyes. "Why are you offering this sort of thing?"

"Because I... I care about you two," Javier confessed, looking down into his empty mug. "I-I really care about you both, and I just want to make sure you're both supported properly."

Yuzuru glanced over at Jun. His child had fallen asleep with Effie still in his arms and his lips parted slightly. Once again, the child's pale pink lower lip had been stained dark red.

"If you don't mind me asking, Yuzuru, is... is everything alright with him?"

"No," Yuzuru confessed. It was like the floodgates of hell had been opened, and tears ran down his cheeks. Javier cuddled him and stroked the back of his head, letting Yuzuru hide his face in Javier's shoulder. He sobbed and hiccuped a little, choking on his sobs before he calmed down enough to talk. "Everything isn't alright with my poor, poor baby. H-He...She lied to me about using the pill, and she told me not to use condoms when we slept together because of the pill. She _told_ me she was on the pill. I've had asthma all my life and so Jun was always at risk of getting it. She knew that. When we realised he had it at a young age, she... she changed." Javier stroked his back as Yuzuru wiped his eyes and continued. "With the asthma, he's more at risk of... More at risk of lung problems like... l-like tuberculosis." Yuzuru sniffed as the weight of his words hit Javier. "He... he's allergic to the antibiotics they would normally use, s-so he's stuck and they don't know how to treat him anymore. We came to Canada so he could get better treatment, but, since we've been here, things have been getting worse. He's lost weight faster, he's had fevers and night sweats, he's been coughing for months, and he recently started coughing up blood. M-my poor baby..." Yuzuru pulled his knees up to his chest and sighed. "She left when Jun first started coughing. Said she couldn't take the two of us having 'weak lungs' when she needed us to be strong and healthy in her life. She left and didn't consider how we would feel. She selfishly abandoned her son."

Javier hugged Yuzuru close and kissed the crown of his head. "It's okay, I promise. Are you alright?"

"Doctors say I'm not at risk," Yuzuru nodded.

"I'm fully vaccinated so I'm sure I'll be alright with him."

"Normally he wears a face mask when we're outside to stop him spreading it, but it makes it harder for him to make friends. No one wants to make friends with the kid who you can't see his full face, do they?"

"I would," Javier said gently, "but then I was the kid who tried to make friends with everyone."

"You're a good person Javi," Yuzuru smiled up at him and placed a gentle kiss on his jawline.

* * *

"Javi!" Yuzuru sobbed down the phone, voice crackling slightly on the line.

"Yuzu, calm down, please, please. What's going on? Are you alright?"

"E-everything's gone wrong. P-please, please please please come to the hospital and meet us. Please! I-I need you, Javi."

Javier kept Yuzuru on the line, putting him on speakerphone when he drove as fast as the law allowed him to across the city and to the hospital. He only just took the time to park properly in a space before he locked his car and ran inside, up to the pediatric ward, and he hugged Yuzuru tightly.

"M-my baby couldn't breathe," he whispered. "H-his lips turned blue, h-he... W-we rushed here b-but... B-but I haven't seen my baby since a-and I don't know where he is."

"Breathe Yuzuru, please. Please, don't have an asthma attack. Jun needs you to stay calm. He's in the hospital. This is the best chance he has."

Yuzuru couldn't calm down. He paced up and down in the waiting room, sipped at the bottle of water Javier bought him from the vending machine, and burst into tears randomly when he summoned up the energy to. Javier sat by him and took care of him the whole time, stroking his back and trying to reassure him. After hours on end of sitting in the waiting room, knowing nothing, a doctor stepped out with a grim expression.

"Mr Hanyu?"

Yuzuru tripped over himself getting to his feet, and Javier held him up, guiding him to the doctor. She sighed, eyes full of pity as she looked at the pair.

"You're Jun's father?"

He nodded and she swallowed with a sigh. "I-I... I-I don't know how to tell you this. Please, please come with me."

She led the pair down a hallway, and Yuzuru gasped as they stepped into a private room. Machines were beeping wildly, and several doctors were still flitting around Jun's tiny little body. The wires and oxygen mask covered him so much it looked like he was more tube than child.

"Mr Hanyu, there isn't really much we can do. The antibiotics aren't working." Yuzuru's legs gave up on him, and Javier caught him before he collapsed. "Your son's condition is not going to improve."

"I-is there nothing else you can do?"

The doctor shook her head, and Yuzuru burst into tears. She patted his shoulder gently.

"I'm so sorry Mr Hanyu."

"T-thank you for everything you've done for him," he mumbled. She nodded, and left him and Javier alone in the room together.

* * *

Jun died two days later after a painful coughing fit. Yuzuru had been by his side in tears the whole time, and he sobbed and broke when the cardiogram flat-lined. Javier had given them both space, and Yuzuru clung to him when his baby's pale and lifeless face was covered up.

Javier attended his funeral, and held the fluffy white bunny rabbit for Yuzuru when the latter gave his eulogy for the child. Javier was there for Yuzuru when a Korean lady tried to speak to Yuzuru, tried to apologise for leaving him.

"Yuzuru, I didn't know how bad things were for you two-"

"Y-you left him," Yuzuru whispered, tears running down his cheeks and soaking into the black lapels of his suit jacket. "You left us when he was getting ill! It's too late for apologies now."

"Still, please, let me apologise to you for leaving you and putting you through this. We... we should talk again and reconcile, and-"

"And what?" Yuzuru cut in, tears still flowing. "You want us to reconcile? You want us to go back to how we were before Jun was born? Jun is, was my life. He became the most important thing to me. You stopped being important to me when you walked out, leaving both of when he got ill. You don't get to ask to reconcile. You don't get to ask for a second chance. J-just... Just go away."

When she tried to talk to him again, Yuzuru buried his face in Javier's shoulder with the bunny in his arms, and he ignored her until she finally got the message and left. Javier guided Javier home, and they sat together on their sofa with heavy silence and grief in the air.

"I'm sorry," Javier whispered.

Yuzuru sniffed, stroking the bunny's ears. "I-It's okay... N-not your fault," he whispered back.

"If there's anything I can do for you..."

"H-hold me," Yuzuru whispered, "a-and please, never let go of me."

Javier held Yuzuru and stroked his hair as Yuzuru cuddled Jun's old therapy rabbit close. Yuzuru was a shattered father, and, now that he'd opened up to Javier, Javi took some of the burden from his shoulders to try and help him through it.

"Jun would be proud of you," he whispered gently. "You're a really strong person."

"I-I think Jun loved you," Yuzuru replied, looking up at him. "Thank you for being my support."

"Always," Javier whispered. "Always."


End file.
